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08-Oct-2017 19:29

Many of us simply want to be validated as legitimate members of our faith communities.

However, some work on both sides of the pulpit remains to be done in many churches before the integration of single believers into our evangelical culture can be called a success.

Your pastor has taken a vow to assist you in your spiritual maturity.

And to the extent that personal relationships depend on your spiritual maturity, then yes, your pastor and, by extension, your church's leadership team should maintain a balance between the needs of all relational dynamics in the congregation.

Some of us act more petulantly than others and church-hop, shopping for a hip mix of trendy singles with just enough angst in common to mask our desperation.

Others of us form cliques with similarly unbetrothed saints, marking time as two by two, couples pair up and split away.

Fourth, church members and denominations should consider re-evaluating their prerequisites for pastors and elders when it comes to singles.

Does "being the husband of one wife" mean one wife at a time, or what?

Cohort-specific ministries can remain, but should be ancillary to the dominant community-based structure of the fellowship.

Should an otherwise qualified never-married man, for example, be denied a shepherding role simply because he doesn't have a wife?

What We Singles Can Do Singles who balk at church ministries which de-emphasize marital status—and therefore don't run what are rapidly considered to be old-fashioned singles ministries—need to consider the value of inter-generational community and cross-congregation fellowship.

Should our modeling of that holy covenant simply be an emotional, economic, or convenient compromise?

How the Church Can Help Not that every single Christian is desperate for marriage.

"With the constant drumbeat of friends getting married and having kids, and with the media's bogus glorification of gorgeous unmarrieds, the last place we want to feel marginalized is at church.

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